teach me how to feel , roxanne

[ANDREW MICHAEL LEVY]

much like any real man on earth, it wasn't like any to notice subtle things. like when his girlfriend got a new hair cut, or a new pair of shoes, or a new outfit...he could be sensitive, he really couldn't be that sensitive. of course she mentioned it, like all other guys, he'd compliment it to the moon. and he'd notice if she got, say, some new lingerie. but for some reason completely beyond him he wasn't noticing something that he really should have. roxanne was putting on a little weight. of course, being a nice guy, even if he did notice he wouldn't say anything. it wasn't even that much. and he would probably still think she was beautiful if she was three hundred and fifty pounds - note the probably - as completely corny as that may or maybe not sound. maybe he was just a little busy thinking about his new and very first solo album that he was in the midst of recording, he probably should have noticed the changes that were going on. he didn't even have an excuse as for why he wasn't noticing. he was usually very "there", as a person. he wasn't very spacey. he had a good attention span. he prided himself on that...only lately his mind always seemed to be stuck up in the recording studio. even when he didn't really want it to be. of course andy cared greatly for roxy. and he liked to think he was pretty good to her. he brought her out to eat and bought her pretty things...even if, fine, he had horrible taste in "pretty things" so most of the time he ended up having to get a lot of assistance from the ladies in jewelry stores and such. that wasn't his fault. once again, he was really only a man. nothing more could be expected from him.

and roxanne was kind of the first girl andy had allowed himself to actually get serious with. in the past he’d dated, yes. he’d even had a few simple flings. but he never really allowed himself to feel the way he felt about roxanne to them. maybe it was because when it came to roxanne he couldn’t quite help the way he ended up feeling...it had just kind of happened. he hadn’t expected it to. when he’d first met her he kind of dismissed her as just another girl who wouldn’t be interestested in him. as much as he knew he wasn’t a hideous looking guy, he was also living on a musician’s sallery. he didn’t have a sport’s car, his apartment was kind of messy, and his clothes weren’t that expensive. and for the longest time he’d won his hair longer than a majority of girls these days even did. actually that was one of the first things he got rid of when he met roxanne. another was the mess of his apartment, but she’d had to help him with that. actually it was their apartment now. but that still took some getting used to, after living alone for so long. but he had to say he liked it more. it was always clean, and he never got lonely. and while roxy did sometimes distract him from writing his songs or something, he never really complained. it was the kind of distraction he liked. ha.

for once this week, though, his mind wasn’t on work. or the recording studio. or finding a manager, or finding a band. because as much as he loved being solo, he missed having a band. or even on touring, which was something he missed dearly. because he was with roxanne and pretty much forcing his thoughts to stay on her as well...not that it was really that hard. she was beautiful, he loved her, he had absolutely no trouble keeping his mind...and eyes on her. even when he had a fuck load of work he was supposed to be doing. they’d start out watching a movie, after she pretty much begged him to, even though he’d been off in his little corner strumming one of his numerous guitars that were littering their quant apartment. but of course, as usual, watching a movie had turned into a make out session. which he really didn’t mind, because as much as he loved roxanne, he didn’t love watching a movie he’d already seen thrice in the last month. he wasn’t even a big fan of movies in the first place. and this definitely got his mind off of his recording that was going to be happening first thing in the morning, that’s for sure. just as he moved his lips off hers and started kissing her neck gently, though, he felt something. he didn’t even know what it was, but it was coming from her stomach. for a moment he just froze, then he pulled away slightly looking at her with big, adorable, confused eyes. “what the hell was that?” if he were a smarter man he would have just known. but despite the honors he pulled in high school, sometimes he lacked common sense.

( status ) finished
( words ) 900something
( tags ) roxanne grey
( outfit ) dis
( notes ) sorry this is fail. i sucksucksuck at starters.

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[ROXANNE CALEIGH GREY]

She knew about a week after it happened. She was late, she was sick, and there was just this small feeling in her gut she knew it was no flu. Sure enough, five pregnancy tests later, all of them with little pink plus signs on them agreed with her theory. She had plan on waiting one week, just to make sure before telling Andy. It had eaten away at her every second of the day, and at one point she had been ready to tell him, but she backed out because he seemed so stressed about the album. She decided to keep the information to herself at the moment, waiting until the time was right to explain to him. Waiting for the day when he was a little less focused on the album and a little less stressed. Everyday, she made sure she got her vomitting done either early in the morning when he was not there and at the studio, or he was passed out from exhaustion and could not hear her in his deep sleep. Every week she made sure she complained about weight gain and making a New Year's promise she was going to lose weight just for bikini season. Every week she went to her doctor's appointment, just to be sure the baby was safe and okay. That everything was going to be fine with her, and this baby. Instead of wearing her tight clothes like she normally would have, she wore her lose fitting clothes in a fashionable style lately. The weight she had gained was starting to round and it'd be a little more than obvious to Andy what was going on with her. Not to mention, he would eventually start to notice that her breasts were already starting to move up in cup sizes and become a little sore and tender to the touch. Everyday though, she felt the need to tell him. To just blurt out how much she loved him and that they were finally starting a family of their own. But everyday she watched him come home dazed, or focus on wor for the album, and everyday she felt a little more and more guilty about bringing somewhat of a burden on his shoulders.

It was a little over four months that the baby, their baby, their daughter as the doctor determined, had been nestled inside her. The baby was her little secret. It had only been recently, earlier last week, that the baby had started her movements. They had started out slow and a little less active, but a week later, the little baby had become quite an athlete and loved to bounce around and kick at Roxy's kidneys every now and then. The moment the baby had moved, Roxy had felt the urge to call Andy, and exclaim the good news, until she realized that Andy was completely oblivious to the fact he was going to be a father in about four and a half months. That's when she came to the conclusion she was going to have to tell him later that week. She couldn't hide her rapidly growing belly from him forever. Eventually, he just had to catch on to what was going on. About her mood swings and odd cravings for peanut butter. About her constant need to pee, and the fact she was waddling around with a swollen belly. Andy surely couldn't be that caught up in his work and that stupid. The only thing that scared her was rejection. Rejection of her, of her daughter. Andy wouldn't want this, right before he came out with his album, right before he started touring. He wouldn't need a nagging girlfriend and a crying baby on his bus. No, if he decided to stay with her, she would stay behind while he toured. His music career was his baby at the moment. He loved it and nursed it constantly and she was going to support him all the way. There is such a thing as modern technology, things like webcam and cellphones would help them stay in touch. Roxanne was starting to accept the fact that she might be a single parent for the first year of their child's life. It was what should would do for Andy. He'd live his dream, and she'd be at home when he needed her or their baby's comfort. That was her role. The comforting girlfriend.

With the pregnancy came a new sort of craving. Surely, Andy couldn't deny the joy of coming home to a girl that was basically all over him with affection and gave him a nice passionate romp in the sheets before he went to bed. Lately, she had noted how tired he had been looking and decided to lay off and give him space when he wanted it. But tonight, she just couldn't stand it. She had picked a boring movie on purpose, knowing it would hold no interest to him nor her for very long and she could have her way with him soon enough. Sure enough, it wasn't long before Roxy's hand just started to gently rub up and down Andy's thigh and her lips started to curiously wander up his throat. A few minutes later, she completely had his attention, considering she had been eased back against the couch and her thighs now wrapped around his waist. She ignored the alien-like squirm in her gut, her mouth moving passionately agains his, rubbing his tongue ever so softly. Her hand moved down to his chest and pulled up his shirt, hungerily arching her hips against his, trying to get a steady friction between them. She grinned to herself, sucking at the side of his throat. "I love you Andy Levy." She had murmured against his skin before she noted the fact his hand moved over her stomach right when the baby gave a nice little kick. He had noticed and a deep redness poured into her cheeks. She pulled back, panic-stricken for a moment. "Just my stomach growling?" She questioned herself somewhat, another kick hitting against her skin and she swallowed hard. "Wow, I must be really hungry." She laughed nervously, pushing his hand away from her stomach and moving it to her thigh, hoping she had pulled his attention away from it. Her hand pulled his face against her, crushing their lips together desperately and anxiously, ignoring the now constant little kicks.

tagged , andysaur
status , done !
words , idk, too lazy
outfit , sweats and a loose tee shirt.
notes , lol, wooow.

[ANDREW MICHAEL LEVY]

if there was one thing andy had never really thought much about, it was being a father. it had just never really occurred to him that there was a possibility. he wasn’t a man whore. he didn’t go around sleeping with anything that seemed to want him - even the times when he’d been on tour. of course he was only human, he’d had his share of one night stands...not since he and roxanne started seeing each other, of course. he was an honest guy, especially in relationships, the last thing he was going to do was cheat on her. he loved her. and luckily for her he wasn’t paranoid, or jealous, so he didn’t even worry about her cheating on him...but that’s besides the point. the point is, andy couldn’t really see himself as a father. he loved kids - to a certain point. his cousin had a kid, and he spent a bit of time around it. it was cute, it was fun to play with, and bring to the park, and watch movies with. and teach swear words until his cousin yelled at him. but he really couldn’t see himself being responsible for one...he was still pretty young. kind of. not really. a lot of people his age were already married...but nonetheless. if he had his way he’d wait until he was in his thirties to have kids - but of course he rarely did. but because of the fact that he only slept with one person, and the fact that the one person he slept with was his girlfriend, and of course the amazing invention of a condom...he didn’t really think he’d have to worry about that. but of course he was wrong. and if he was paying more attention he’d notice it. the weight she was putting on. her morning sickness. the fact that she seemed undeniably horny - there was really no other word for it...and the fact that she was always asking him to pick up peanut butter on the way home from work. who the hell even ate that much peanut butter?

but of course andrew levy was a decent person. if he had taken the time to think about it, he’d know that if he was a father he’d take responsibility. even if the mother wasn’t the love of his life, even if she didn’t want him to have anything to do with their kid. he’d pay child support, and send he or she christmas gifts...really, andy had a great dad to use as an example. his mother was always kind of flaky, as sweet as she could be. and so the roles in their house were reversed. his dad would stay home and take care of him, and his mom would go work late shifts at diners and such. he was even pretty sure that when he was really young she’d been a stripper, but he didn’t like to think about that. his dad on the other hand...well, he was the kind of dad andy hoped to be one day. he was warm, and sweet, and compassionate. he still called andy at least once a week to check up on him, and some of andy’s best memories were fishing with the guy. he wasn’t the really badass dad that all of his friends thought was so cool. he didn’t ride a motorcycle or listen to good music - although he did have all the albums from the numerous bands andy had been in. he was just undeniably sweet, and always there for him. unlike his mother. who was sweet, but always seemed to caught up in her own world to pay attention to him for more than five minutes, even as a kid. he’d always wondered how the two had fallen in love...until he fell in love for himself and realized when it came to love, you couldn’t help who it was.

but this was the road all signs pointed to. for once andy’s eyes were open and he was paying attention. roxanne looked nervous. her cheeks were pink - she seemed to want to distract him. and if he weren’t so alert it might have worked...or if he didn’t keep feeling those kicks. kicks. it was all making sense - and yet it wasn’t. he knew what was going on - he didn’t know how to feel about it. and so despite the fact that he wanted to just forget about it and go back to kissing his girlfriend, he pulled away once more, shaking his head. “i don’t think that was your stomach growling, baby.” he said seriously, moving his hand off her thigh and putting it back on her stomach. he knew what was going on - there was no denying it. this was completely unplanned...how long had she gone on without even telling him that she was carrying his kid? he didn’t want to be mad at her or anything, but he couldn’t help but be slightly annoyed. not at her, not at the child, not even at the horrible timing of this all...but at himself for being so caught up in work and not even noticing. swallowing the lump in his throat in a slightly nervous fashion he attempted a smile, but it probably didn’t work out quite as well as he’d wanted it to. “is there anything you want to tell me?”

( status ) finished
( words ) 900
( tags ) roxanne grey
( outfit ) dis
( notes ) <3

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